Sinister energy drinks risk to our youth: Jim.

Friday April 4, 2008
Jim Anderton's office sets sights of sinister energy drinks
Out of control teens at a dance party get 'high' at an energy drink sponsored event.

Following the ban on party pills, the NZ government are looking to setting their sights on energy drink manufacturers as part of their ‘New Generation’ drug crackdown. Sandie Smitherington investigates.

Energy drinks are scheduled for a review on their safety it was today revealed by a spokesman for Jim Anderton’s office. “It has come to our attention that these drinks are being used at parties to keep young people awake beyond their normal bed time hours and many are parting until the early hours in the morning,” the spokesman said.

Even more alarming TheOtherNews has learned that some of these party drinks are mixed with alcohol. One potent mix, with the street name “Bull-Rush” mixes one popular drink with gallons of Vodka. “People are drinking these and dancing the night away, becoming more intoxicated as the night goes on. It’s a new crisis!”

Hospital admissions have risen sharply to 2 cases a month, with some people complaining that they can’t sleep after just several of these mix cocktails.

“Even worse is the total lack of regulation by these drinks manufacturers, the drinks are available over the counter to kids from the local corner dairy” the spokesman commented. “They appear to be trying to out do each other, pumping up their black magic voodoo secret additives to whip youngsters into a frenzy with total disregard. This is simply a disaster waiting to happen.”

Jim Anderton sets his sights on an energy drink.

Chief spokesman for Veeb Energy drinks Pat Wowden released a statement: “Our drinks are safe. Sure they give people a pep up, that is their whole point after all. We’re not selling anything dangerous and we have worked closely with the Food and Health Standards Authority. We have been transparent all the way through, and kept open dialog with government representatives. Now that they have made everything else illegal, they are setting their sites on us. Look out coffee lovers, you could be next!”

Anderdon replied, “That’s just nonsense. I like coffee, coffee’s ok.”

The review over whether the drinks are safe or not is expected to take 6 months, with a Govt budget 142 times more than is spent on drug education. An inquiry will then be launched into how they should be banned. Jim Anderton’s office released a statement to it’s supporters, affectionately known as the cardigans “These party drinks should be off the shelf by years end, or even sooner if we have our way.”